I get it now

One of my absolute favorite memories of childhood was running around the fair with Debi and getting on all the rides. There was no eating or stopping or worrying about anything but having fun. I went with Debi because her mom didn't mind us on the rides. My mom didn't like me to go on rides- she worried. Overprotective, I thought at the time. Now I get it.

Fast forward 30 years. Yesterday, I took the kids to the fair. Tara wanted to go on the ferris wheel. Nice slow sweet ride. ALL I could think of was something going horribly wrong and Tara plunging to her death. My rational brain said, calm down weirdo, this is a safe sweet ride. My mommy brain said, OH MY GOSH I HEARD A SNAP. "Tara, hold on. Tara don't rock the seat. Tara don't lean. Tara don't slip out under the bar." Tara was understandably getting annoyed with me. So I feigned a smile and weakly and pathetically whimpered-
"Isn't this fun? Look how high we are. Yay." Tara asked me why I was gripping the bar so hard. I told her she'd understand one day when she had kids. She sighed- just like I did 30 years ago.

We went on my mom's birthday. I think she may have looked down from heaven and smiled.